Dear Mr Cowley,
I hope that this missive finds you in better spirits than my last. I am aware that since the arrival of that unhappy note your poor wife Catherine, has been, as I myself have, in a state of untold anguish, scarcely recovering from one fit of nervous hysteria afore she descends into another. Such frequent faints must be proving quite a trial for all concerned. Poor Catherine has ever been at the mercy of her nerves. Though, confess, being so very entirely sans Maria has left me hankering after the happy oblivion that only feminine frailty will provide.
However Charles, I do not write today to convey sentiments of sympathy but something rather more extraordinary. Indeed what has passed has left me in a state of some considerable perplexed confusion, it is so peculiar a peculiarity that I know not quite how to elucidate upon the matter, for it is so very illogical as to render it quite celestial. Thus I have enclosed this letter in the hope that all the particulars shall be made quite plain to you and poor Catherine,
Yours in stupefaction,
Lord Henry Woodville.